How to Overcome Adversity in Life: Surviving

ADVERSITY HAPPENS

Adversity is an inevitable part of everyone’s life. It’s certainly not something you can or should plan your life around. However, being realistic, you know it’s not a matter of “if” but “when” it will affect your lives. Even so, tragedy, misfortune, illness, and setbacks usually come as a surprises, often when you least expect them, typically without warning. So, how do you overcome adversity in life and in the process survive? This is a terrific question with no simple or quick answer. The good news is that there are things you can do before encountering adversity and there are things you can do once confronted with it. Here’s an approach you can use when first challenged with an adversity:

Recognize it: Give it a name! Don’t ignore it, it won’t go away! Ignoring the adversity will allow it to overwhelm and consume you.

Confront it: Take it on! Do whatever is needed to get beyond the adversity.

Overcome it: Develop a plan to work through the adversity. Be persistent and consistent in your efforts.

It is interesting that adversity is often associated with negative outcomes. For some people, encountering adversity results in leaping to the worst-case scenario, one in which you are powerless to act. In fact, a number of individuals “give up” far too quickly as they face an adversity and things don’t go their way. Accepting that adversity is a fact of life and learning to transform it into a positive motivator can be challenging. Just the possibility of adversity can dictate daily decisions, paralyze you or limit your expectations – but it shouldn’t. You have the power to take it on!

HOW DO YOU REACT TO ADVERSITY

Adversity can impact your life in a positive way and help you to grow. You can (even) find strength through adversity. Adversity may be the opportunity for greatness. Adversity, and more importantly overcoming it, can be a blessing leading to better things in your life. It was for me. In September 2005 I heard those three words no one every wants, plans or expects to hear in life, “You have cancer!” More specifically Acute Myeloid Leukemia (AML). – see my complete story https://donarmstronglive.com/welcome-to-finish-your-race-living-your-best-now-life/ – In that moment of adversity there were 4 ways I could react to cancer:

1. Allow it to define me
2. Allow it to consume and ultimately destroy me
3. Allow it to strengthen me
4. Allow it to be an opportunity for change and growth

How you react to adversity is always your choice. It was my choice and I choose to look at it as an opportunity to change and grow! As strange as it may sound, my journey with leukemia did change almost every aspect of my life for the better. I consider myself blessed and fortunate to have survived my cancer journey. Unfortunately (sadly), others facing leukemia, or any other cancer, have not experienced the same outcome.

It is inevitable that at some point, life will knock you down, but (and this is big) you must get up each and every time and move forward. So, decide (now), beginning with the 4 ways noted above, how you will handle unexpected setbacks when they happen. This decision will put you in position to feel stronger and more determined to overcome any adversity.

WHAT YOU CAN AND CAN’T PLAN FOR

Everyone experiences stumbling blocks from time to time – rush hour traffic, a minor fender bender, an appliance breaking, a lost wallet, a child coming down with a cold, and more. However, as life progresses, sometimes more serious hardships can really rock your world. For me, the unexpected adversity of a life threatening illness stopped me in my tracks. Everything in my world was put on hold. You may have experienced something similar, such as the death of a loved one, a job loss, the breakup of a relationship or a natural disaster which cause you to hit the pause button and put your life on hold. At this moment, in real time, a significant percentage of the United States (and the World) population is dealing with the effects of the COVID-19 coronavirus. This is definitely unwanted, unplanned & certainly unexpected. The impact of the coronavirus touches almost all of the categories noted above, including, but not limited to; personal illness, loss of a job, financial devastation, death of family member or friend and maybe more importantly the uncertainty of the future.

In my battle with cancer, I learned a difficult lesson: Adversity has its own timetable. You are no doubt feeling this same lesson as the drama of the coronavirus plays out. It is difficult to have a clear understanding of what’s ahead and there are certainly limited expectations regarding what’s next, because this is a new experience. There is no script to follow so you just live it day by day. You and I crave certainty, however, there is nothing (at least to date) that can provide a clear and predictable path to the coronavirus outcome. So, we recognize it, confront it and overcome it! Day by day we SURVIVE!

MENTAL TOUGHNESS

As an endurance athlete, I am keenly aware that mental toughness is crucial to completing a half marathon, marathon, triathlon, or a one hundred-mile cycle ride. Mental toughness means pushing ahead through difficult circumstances with confidence. It’s doing what needs to be done in spite of obstacles. I believe we all have the mental-toughness trait within us, and when the circumstance calls for it (like the coronavirus issue we are facing), we are ready, willing, and able to use it.

No matter how many races I’ve run, no matter how well I’ve trained, no matter how good the weather is on race day, I know there will be a least one moment of pain at some point in the race. I can’t tell you when or where, I can only tell you it will happen, and when it does, I might be tempted to think I can’t go on and should stop. It’s predictable for me to want to quit at least three or four times during a marathon, and so I’ve become mentally prepared for that moment to arrive. When it does, I’m ready. My strategy for pushing through may be as simple as saying to myself, “Trust your training!” All it takes is a little positive self-talk to get over the hurdle of doubt and keep on keeping on.

Mental toughness works for me in endurance races, and I know it will work for you when you encounter adversity. You can’t predict adversity, but you can prepare yourself mentally for the inevitability that it will find you. Don’t trick yourself into thinking life will always be footloose and fancy free. Accept now that adversity will play a role in your life, and learn to trust that you can handle whatever comes your way. It is important to know how to overcome adversity in life to survive and move forward.

Knowing that adversity is something you will encounter puts you in a position of strength. Realizing that there are a few things you should not do when you reach one of life’s inevitable impasses puts you in position to begin to overcome the adversity quickly and appropriately. Don’t take unnecessary risks, reach for unrealistic solutions, and, most importantly, don’t overreact. Attitude plays a huge role in overcoming hardship. So, think positive! No matter what life throws at you, you always have the opportunity to decide for yourself how to face the unexpected. The more mentally prepared for adversity you are, the better equipped you’ll be to take action.

DEALING WITH ADVERSITY

The Greek philosopher Herodotus said, “Adversity has the effect of drawing out strength and qualities of a man that would have lain dormant or absent.” Truer words were never spoken. The setbacks you’ll encounter in your life have the potential to lead to personal growth. They certainly did for me. Overcoming adversity can give you momentum and confidence in your life. If you control your reaction to adversity, adversity won’t control you.

When an unexpected misfortune, in the form of an adversity, comes crashing into your world,
what can you do? Here are some useful strategies that have worked for me:

• Stay calm. When in doubt, take a deep breath.
• Remain grounded. Avoid jumping to a worst-case scenario or overreacting.
• Trust yourself and your instincts. You’re stronger than you think.
• React with clear and rational thinking by defining your options and thinking through solutions.
• Find ways to maintain a sense of normalcy, even if it’s as simple as committing to brush your teeth each morning and evening.
• Focus and do your best to avoid being swept up by anxiety or fear.
• Believe in yourself and trust in your faith for courage and strength.
• Seek support from family, friends, a mentor, a professional counselor, or a minister.
• Develop an achievable game plan and have a backup plan in the event that your primary approach doesn’t give you the results you need.
• Sleep on it. The older I’ve gotten, the more I understand that it’s better to think before you react to just about anything. Time will assist you in clarifying your plan.
• Understand that no matter what, nothing and no one can prevent you from choosing how to react to a challenge.
• Never, ever quit—adversity is your call to action. So take action. Remember, even not taking action is a decision.

When you overcome adversity, you change your life! It is my hope that you are now well equipped to overcome adversity in life: Surviving!

If your interested in reading more about the life changing strategies I learned on my cancer journey, purchase a copy of my book, Finish YOUR Race.